Finally – It’s Christmas!!!!!
A time of year I notoriously hate. Not because I am a Scrooge, no in fact I love Christmas Day, it is just the time of year. I have always been somewhat of a person who suffers more with low mood and depression during the winter months. It may be the constant darkness or the fact that my birthday is in December or that fact that birthday’s and Christmas’ really reveal how many true friends you have and since my panic disorder days I don’t have that many. Who know’s!!! All I know is that I do not suffer in this alone. Seasonal Affective Disorder is around and is thought to affect 2 million people in the UK alone (check out the NHS website: http://www.nhs.uk/conditions/Seasonal-affective-disorder/Pages/Introduction.aspx)
But, this year I was ecstatic for the Xmas break to come, for once! Is it because I am in a relationship for the first time in around 7 years?? I hope not!!! I don’t like the thought of relying on someone else for a positive outlook or to be in a good mood. No, I think it is more to do with the fact that I can sleep in, I have a break from attending university, I can do work at my own pace in my own time. I can watch television without feeling guilty. I can spend a full 1hr30mins in the gym as opposed to a sneaky 20mins. Who am I kidding – perhaps it is a bit of both. Nothing wrong with having someone in your life who makes you happy, as long as you don’t rely on that person to make you happy!! Ultimately only you can make you happy!
So, after the summer holidays I learnt that the breaks we have from university are to, in fact, have a break. So I will be mindful of doing that, but unfortunately I do also have work to do. I have created a timetable – this is allows me to see what I have to do, my timeframe for doing it in and when to do it, as well as providing me with actual break times to have fun, socialise and more importantly veg on the sofa watching rubbish made for tv Christmas movies. Hopefully I will be able to catch up with all the things I fell behind with in November, but I am not going to pressure myself. I will do what I can do and I will be happy with this – trying to become less of a perfectionist (see my October blog).
In January I have a mini break away to look forward to, so I am going to work towards that as being my treat. It is always good to reward yourself for hard work and this semester I have worked hard. I may not have always done what I wanted to do, in the way that I wanted to do it, but I have got through the first semester of my final year of university. Graduation is in site. I can almost grasp it! (right now I am grinning from ear to ear, cor blimey, how far have I come!) Any time you feel like you can’t reach your goal – YOU CAN!!!!! The path may not smooth, in fact it might be blooming bumpy, but you will get there and it will mean so much more to you than someone who has had it ‘easy’! Believe in yourself and your ability!!!
So, with this my friends I bid you a Merry Christmas.
If I have anything to update I will post another blog, but if not have a great one. Spend time with family and friends. If you do feel down, force yourself to get out and about; a brisk walk or a trip to the gym, Christmas shopping or visit a Christmas market – trust me, it is the best form of medicine. Don’t eat and drink too much. Have fun. Oh and Happy New Year.